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17 October 2017 @ 04:41 am
Late-Night Musings: That first-time  
Watched a youtube video where this gal fangirled and gushed over seeing her favorite singer in an upcoming concert for the first time and it made me think of meeting Jensen for the first time. There's nothing that can replace that first con, of seeing the actors, that first photo-op, talking to them, realizing that they are indeed right in front of you as they sign their autograph, of meeting other fans and realizing you're not some sort of freak. A lot of that first-time feeling fades over time and I find myself grasping to get it back. But that's impossible. You can never re-live a first time. It is special, treasured, unique.

I think that's why I adore and envy the newbies I meet each year at VanCon. Their excitement is a delight and takes me back to when I was like that, soaking in everything that a con provides. They're so nervous in the photo-op and autograph lines and I try to settle them down, but it's really impossible. I know, I've been there. In fact, sometimes I still get nervous waiting in line. What will I say? What will I do? Sometimes I have a plan and sometimes I don't. And sometimes I have a plan until I get up to them and then it all flies out the window! But I welcome the nervousness, because it's that one little bit of newbie-ness that I retain. It gives me at least a tiny taste of that first photo-op with Jensen all over again. ♥


Current Location: in Mac-Land
Current Mood: nostalgicnostalgic
Hermine Kurotowaherminekurotowa on October 17th, 2017 06:00 pm (UTC)
Two years ago in Rome, I met Jensen for the first time at the photo ops. I said, I promise I won't puke on your shoes. *FACEPALM*
supernutjapansupernutjapan on October 18th, 2017 01:11 am (UTC)
Beautiful art hon❤ I have yet to experience that first time and I wonder if I ever will...
milly_galmilly_gal on October 18th, 2017 05:21 am (UTC)
Two years ago I met Jensen and Jared for the first time during a Photo and Auto session, and it still gives me the biggest happy, but it's also made me less hungry for another chance to meet them, I never thought I'd experience, I have twice now, so I'm cool ♥
roxymissrose: heart roseroxymissrose on October 18th, 2017 03:45 pm (UTC)
Ach! You all are so brave! I just couldn't do it, have never been able to. That's why I love reading about people's meets. :)
meesasometimesmeesasometimes on October 18th, 2017 05:29 pm (UTC)
It is that big and that epic isn't it, no matter how well or how badly it goes it's so shocking to lay actual eyes on them for the first time and then touch them, how do they expect us to have any sanity in that moment. For me it was the second con during autos when Jensen finally signed my arm. After saying no the first time I became obsessed with it, I was a woman on a mission, I seriously felt like I could die now. My life just clicked in place, something I had literally dreamed about for 6 years. ugh. And now I just get to look at my arm and I feel that feeling again. I love it. Sadly I can't imagine ever wanting anything that bad again.
metallidean_grlmetallidean_grl on October 26th, 2017 09:31 pm (UTC)
Yea, that first time is truly special. I still remember clearly walking up to him and looking directly in his eyes and feeling this warmth and excitedness. Each time I walk up to him I still feel that warmth and I am still excited, its just not as intense as it was the first time. I look forward to that small intimate moment each year, and given the fact I didn't get it this year, I felt a little down and depressed. My one bright spot in a rather difficult year, having a picture and hugging him those few brief seconds. I almost ran up to get my picture so many times, but I just was not in a great frame of mind to smile for a picture. If I could have just had the moment with him without the picture, I would have done it. Even after all these years, it is still a very special moment.