raloria - Screencapping Goddess (raloria) wrote,
raloria - Screencapping Goddess

Just me beating myself up as usual

I know, I know...I should be in bed. I'm going, I swear.

Mom & I were busy shopping all afternoon & evening Thursday. My body is now screaming at me for overuse: my feet, legs, & back. Ow.

Anyway, we came home & I got online as I usually do. Got caught up on all things LJ, which actually took a while. Then I was downloading some shows I've missed over the past few days. And instead of working on my 703 review and getting some other things done, I watched the 3 episodes of Prime Suspect that I've missed. I was so tired from the day that I didn't want to think or work on anything. I just wanted to watch some TV and relax.

And yet I feel guilty about indulging in simple TV watching.

How dare I take time out like that for myself when I should be working on posts for everyone else?
Yes, I know I need help. *facepalms*

I feel bad that I let my episode review fall behind yet again. It's not what I had planned at all. I was going to get it done last weekend. That simply didn't happen. Truth is, I'm still looking for an easy way to do my reviews. I'm afraid posting caps w/my review is still taking too long and involves too much work. *sigh* But I feel that if I just make a quick post on Friday night about my thoughts that everyone will feel cheated or something. As wynefred reminded me, I don't do anything half way. It's just hard to put together something so impressive for the reviews when it takes so long to put together. :(

Maybe just one cap? Can I do that? Can I really limit myself that way?
The thought has crossed my mind, but can I take that step back? Or will I feel bad by not posting the proper amount of pretty for everyone with my reviews?

*heavy sigh*

Wanted to get this out there, in the ether, to you, my friends, who I believe would understand. It's a silly thing to vent about, I know, but it means a lot to me and I'm struggling with it. I guess being as tired as I am right now also has something to do with it. Thanks for reading.

Tags: emo, livejournal, ramblings, real life
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